she was so not down for the gang bang
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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