we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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