he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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