Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
