The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
