The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
