PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
