I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Randomize
