Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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