I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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