So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Randomize
