Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
