i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize