So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Randomize