good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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