I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
