His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
