Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize