11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
