just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
