My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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