Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize