The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
is wine microwaveable?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Randomize
