The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
