Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
You don't make any sense
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