shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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