I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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