she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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