So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Quick, to the slutcave!
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
