is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
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