We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
