I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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