im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
