lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
