Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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