If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
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