After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
