You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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