Cold hands, warm shart.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
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