if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
