My first STD was from a foam party
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
