those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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