Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
