Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
