were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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