Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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