Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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