your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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