Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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