dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
