what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
