Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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